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The intent of this blog is to form an interactive community where parents of dead babies can come together and swap information, stories, tears, memories and encouragement. This is designed to be a neutral place. We are not religious nor are we anti-religious. Come as you are. You can sign the guest book, add your baby(ies) to the baby name memory list, review books on infant death, add warnings about movies and books that contain a dead baby, add your blog to our directory or a number of other things. Don't hesitate to contact us if you have any questions or would like to see something added to this blog. Rule One: be kind to each other. We're all in this together. We all suffer and miss our babies madly.

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Friday, August 14, 2009

Question of the Week

Studies show that regular exercise can help to battle depression by releasing feel good chemicals in your brain. So, this weeks question is this:

Have you found that exercising really does help to release some of the tension, stress, anxiety and everything else that is associated with grief? Do you exercise to find relief? What form of exercise have you found relieves you the most? How often do you do this?

9 comments:

Heather said...

Sometimes, when I can talk myself into doing it. I like to go for long walks in the late evening with my dog and iPod with soothing music. But on days when I use my elliptical and I run my butt off on it I notice that I tend to sob, uncontrollably even without thinking of my son. Maybe it's like smashing things. You just need a release, and the elliptical foreces one out of me. I just find it hard to talk myself into doing much of anything, much less exercising.

Heather said...

I don't get anywhere near as much exercise as I should, for some reason I'm having a hard time walking back into the gym, where I know one person knows what happened. I do feel better after I go for walks at the bike path, it is beautiful there, and i feel at peace sometimes, but I find a 45-min walk absolutely exhausting. It may be more the fresh air and sunlight...
I found it interesting that you mentioned crying after exercise. My husband said that the first time he was on the elliptical at the gym he felt like crying afterward. It must be releasing something. he says playing basketball (something he's done almost his whole life) helps him, keeps him from beating the crap out of someone...nice. But whatever works!

Sophie said...

I didn't exercise for a long time. My husband and I started walking late at night (my sister lives with us so she watches over my little boy). They've been very good actually. It relieves tension and it gives us some really nice time to talk. My husband and I talk about our baby girl all the time. It has been both cathartic and bonding.

I do find exercise for exercise's sake extremely difficult. I am just so tired (and lazy) but I look forward to my walks with my husband and I feel good afterwards.

Once A Mother said...

My favorite thing to do is go walking on some of the many trails in my area, but in doing so it often reminds me of what it felt like to walk there pregnant dreaming of the future, and I also encounter alot of moms with strollers. Because of this I have taken up hiking and biking, they don't require as much interaction with others. Unfortunately many times exercise doesnt happen because this grief is so exhausting. There are days where I just feel so sad that the energy for exercise, though it probably WOULD make me feel better, just is not there.

Mary said...

I have found that it takes so much energy for me to even think about exercising. I wasn't an avid person with it but, I did do it when I knew I needed to lose a few pounds. I am still working on the last ten for the past few months. But, I do a 30 minute walk every once in a while. I just find it hard to do because I used to walk that way when I was pregnant. During those walks I would talk to Lukas. I would make plans with him for when he was supposed to be here. I just end up crying especially when a song plays that reminds me of him.

I usually am so exhausted from the walk and the crying that it is probably when I get the best sleep.

caitsmom said...

It does help if I can just get myself out to walk. If DH goes with me, I'm fine, but I don't like to walk alone since Caitlin died. I used to be an avid hiker, but I'm not ready to do that again. Peace.

Sara said...

In the early months, lots and lots of miles walking . . . a little cross-country skiing and snowshoeing early on . .. yoga, most helpful, though perhaps more for the mental as for the physical . . . canoeing. Being outdoors (for everything but the yoga) was probably in someways as helpful as the exercise itself. I walked a lot by myself, but the did the rest of the activities with my husband. It was good to have time time together. All of these things were hard as they were things I expected I wouldn't be able to do for a while, but I made myself do them anyway. I'm 1 3/4 years away from my son's death. I'm still walking a lot, now running regularly, wishing I had time to do yoga again, and paddling when we have time.

Anonymous said...

i'm so glad to find this blog.... i don't feel so alone now. i can be sad here...thank you

Andrew said...

Is working on house projects considered exercise? After our loss, we threw ourselves into our various house projects, like finishing the basement bathroom and remodeling the man cave. At first, it was mostly because now we can (my wife would not have been any help if she was still pregnant). Later on, it was more a thought that something good should come out of this whole experience, like new rooms and a usable basement bathroom. I guess it was sort of therapy sessions for both of us/